Campaign life is brutal. I moved 2,600 miles from Virginia to Arizona to work on Kyrsten Sinema’s campaign for Congress, and though she won, and though I think every minute I (and everyone) put into that campaign was vital to her winning, and though I know she is making a difference on Capitol Hill, it doesn’t make campaign life any less than brutal.
Fact of the matter was, I had been flirting with this guy for almost a week. He too was working on the campaign, and when you spend twenty hours a day with someone, you more or less get sick of them. But this guy was different. He didn’t get on my nerves.
It was a week before the campaign, and I went to a Halloween party with him. This party had sixteen kegs, a fifteen dollar cover charge, and a bunch of people I didn’t know. Additionally, the movie Magic Mike was playing, projected on the roof of the garage, had beer pong, and more importantly Jello shots.\
Yes, I said beer pong andJello shots.
It was my kind of party.
A few rounds into beer pong with this guy, and I felt a deeper connection to him. Or I was drunk…probably the later.
In any regard, I went home with him. He was dressed in some costume, I can’t remember. He may have been a banana, or maybe he was a yellow Teletubbie. Mostly I remember the color of yellow. I was really drunk which meant he was a sure thing. Or at least I was.
In his apartment, I laid down on his bed. I was dressed in a tee-shirt that was clever (it was a campaign shirt) and I went in a clever costume – an overworked campaign worker, it was the truth. I had gone from the campaign office straight to the party, and from the party straight to the yellow Teletubbie’s house. I had been up since six am, and it was now three in the morning. I was drunk, and he went to go change out of the yellow costume.
As he changed, I thought about the billion things I needed to do in just five hours. Then I thought about all the booze I had that night, and how hung over I would be the next day.
And then I woke up. My dreams had been of various yellow things. Mostly there were dancing Teletubbies and a ton of bananas. Those bananas may have been talking.
I turned to him, and he smiled. “You fell asleep awfully fast yesterday,” he said. I attempted to smile, got up, threw on yesterday’s campaign shirt, said good bye and rushed out the door.
Campaign life is brutal, so brutal, I fell asleep before we got to have sex.