For those of you who haven’t noticed, I am super excited to release my second album, titled, “I Am No Musician” out for digital release on May 17th– my 26th birthday. If I could have anything in the world for my birthday, it would be that you all listen to and download this album.
“I Am No Musician” is a huge step forward in my musical career. First off, let me say, I am no musician; I even plead my case in the song “At Heart” which will be featured on this album.
The simple fact of the matter is I enjoy writing lyrics to songs so much. I have worked with real musicians in the past writing lyrics and it made my day when I got to hear them sing what I had written. Additionally, I really enjoy singing. I do it often in the shower, and thought, well shoot, let’s bring that singing in the shower to a studio. So I did, and this album is the result of that deadly combination of loving to write lyrics and sing.
I am a writer first and foremost; however, I have experienced quite a bit over the past couple of years and have not gotten all of my feelings regarding all sorts of subjects out, just yet. So instead of boring you beautiful readers of my blog with another blog post about how awesome you are, or how hurt I am, I decided to release an album.
This album is going to be much darker than my last album “Big Gay Superstar.” Big Gay Superstar was most comprised of dance songs. In it I was getting my feet wet in the musical world, and did not challenge myself in terms of using my voice and writing powerful lyrics.
This new album has a few fast-paced songs, such as “Sexy Sexy” and “I Don’t Like U” and even “Stop” but for the most part it is much slower, and much deeper than anything I have ever written.
The single that I am going to be promoting throughout the summer is titled “Hate Me.” The lyrics in this song are devoted specifically to the Joker (for those of you who have been following my blog for the past couple of years you know exactly who this man is). The Joker was my first boyfriend who abused and hurt me. He left me with black-eyes, and a broken heart. With that, I directly attack the song we called “ours” which was a song by Rihanna and Eminen titled “Love the Way Lie.” The song I wrote attacking the Joker’s and my relationship, and our so-called song includes the lyric “I don’t love the way you lie, I am sorry, I am just not that guy, anymore.” It’s a really powerful song, and though it might be somewhat more of a dance beat, the lyrics, and my voice in it, make me really proud.
Another song about the Joker on this album is titled “Remember Love.” This song is slower, and talks about all of the pain and all of the memories I have associated with the Joker. He broke my heart, and now he is on blast with this new album. I hope he listens to it hurt and cries a little, because lord knows I cried some while writing these lyrics, and singing these songs.
Beyond the pain the Joker inflicted on me, this album also features song about getting sober. In the song “Blessed,” I specifically talk about how I am getting older and how I am so blessed for getting a second chance at life, because I really am. “Clean and sober, that life is older, and I am getting older,” I sing, marking how thankful and happy I am that I am going on to live another day, drug-free.
The Joker isn’t the only guy who has hurt me in the past couple of years and this album shows it. The song “I Don’t Like U” and “Sweet Arkansas” is about a more recent guy, who I called Arkansas. Arkansas is a guy I really liked, and who just didn’t meet the criteria that I now have in place for perspective boyfriends. He hurt me by being too emotionally unavailable and for leading me on. I am really proud of both of these songs because “I Don’t Like U’ is more fast-paced and really well done and attacks him down to every little thing I could think of, including the dumb tattoo on his chest. Meanwhile “Sweet Arkansas” is slower, and more country-pop inspired, where I state that I am “cursed” for liking him. Honestly, I took a lesson out of Miranda Lambert’s playbook, and decided to write something that was mean and honest.
Meanwhile, in the song “Hypnotized” I use my voice is ways I have never used it. I worked really hard on that song, and talk about how I used drugs, and how it was always under a guys influence. Because I am so excited about this album and want to promote it, I will be (I swear) releasing a music video. I have already started some of the recording of the music video, and it is with the song “Hypnotized.” Simply, “Hypnotized” is a really powerful, slower song, which I can envision so well. I know exactly how I want the musical video for it to look and am working hard to make sure I can make something so y’all can visualize that song like I do.
Other songs I am really proud of on this album include the song “Closer.” This is one of the only love songs I have ever written. It’s more fast-paced but the lyrics to it, and my voice in it, are really quite something.
The last song on this album is going to be a cover song. It’s titled “Wildcard + Neon (Cover).” For those of you who know Paulina Vo you will recognize this song as something she put out years ago. Long before she was signed to any Indie Label, she released the raw song “Wildcard.” In this song she talks about being in love with someone who is addicted to drugs. It’s one of my favorite songs by her and I listen to it often. When doing a cover of it, I didn’t just want to copy her because frankly, that would be impossible, so I decided to splice it with another song about being in love with someone who is addicted to drugs. I chose the “Neon” by John Mayer. Mayer is one of my most favorite musicians out there, someone who I was introduced to by Ms. Vo, and his song “Neon” is a really story about being in love with someone who uses. This cover is a beautiful, raw, splice of two really powerful songs. I stretch out my vocal abilities in this song and am really proud of how it came out. It’s raw and deep, and lyrically powerful, and it’s nothing I thought I could ever do.
All in all, it’s pretty clear, I am so excited about this album, and cannot wait for all of you beautiful people to hear it. I worked hard at it, used my voice in ways I didn’t think I could, meanwhile pouring my heart and life into the lyrics. I do hope y’all enjoy. The album will be out for digital release on May 17th, with at least one music video following, and possibly a remix of a song being released separately. I really hope y’all enjoy.