Glitter On The Pussy Seems Wrong

The other night, I was met a dear friend of mine at this cute pub not far from my home. 
I walked into the pub, and sat down, and a few minutes into the conversation, she told me about this Social Living deal she had purchased that included a free vajazzling. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. 
Vajazzling, for those of you like myself who have no idea what it is, is, and I have to bring in an outside source here so you don’t think I am just making this shit up, so according to some spa website, it’s “the act of applying glitter and jewels to a woman’s nether regions for aesthetic purposes.”

At first, I didn’t believe this was a real thing, but after some smart-phoning, and several pictures later, it became apparent it was. Since I do not want to recommend you go and look at images of this shit (the one with this post is as much as a homo like myself could stand) let me describe some of them:
One of the pictures I saw looked like an STD. It was a butterfly.
Another one looked made a vagina look like it had just been fucked by a powered donut. 
And finally, and my favorite, looked like it could be useful. The vagina obviously had not been shaved beforehand (as I should be I must note, it even says so on the self application video I watched) and the little gems appeared like they could be sprung off of the pubic hair and hit intruders in the face. It’s almost like a modern-day chastity belt.
Anyway, thinking about this — err — process, sounds pretty awful. Ladies should not be putting glue down there. It can’t be good. And sex alone after this process just seems dangerous. What happens if the gem gets on the dick and goes in there? That would be difficult to explain to the doctor.
When it comes to glitter ladies, take a lesson from the gays and don’t put on your privates.

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